And I dont even really know what that means.
– I know that its a big old holiday for the USA, rooted in the point that europeans kind of found it and then overzealously claimed it as all their own and it all started to get all exciting and countryish, Ive been watching a documentary drama on John Adams for the later stuff.
– I know that its mainly based around going to see your family and eating food, oh, and watching The Macys Parade (a parade, with enormous inflatable animals, shown on TV) and perhaps having a big family argument (its like proper British Christmas, but with no unwanted presents) and then some big-puffed-up-rugby-fakeball in the afternoon.
– I know that its the one holiday here that Ive experienced as being almost completely unconsumerist. It really is just about being with your family. And. And And I really miss my family. Theyre very far away.
The tradition here at thanksgiving is to go around the table and give thanks to something for the things you feel thankful for. While not agreeing with the whole higher-power bit of the tradition, as ever, I actually feel really powerfully positive about the thankful bit.
Because Ive always, quite contrary to my depressive and anxiety-powered personality, been realy attracted to positive thinking. I want it. I want it a lot. And I try to do it, every chance I have. And if anyone ever asks me, I will be able to name a dozen-dozen blessings that I have. Blessings as in coincidental amazingness, rather than things any higher power would take the time bestowing upon me. There are hundreds of happenings that I am grateful for. Hundreds. None of them will be about liking myself in the slightest, but thats fine. Thats just how I roll.
So tomorrow – when I come back from a proper lunch with some very old family friends that I met first when I was one year old, and then possibly once since then – I will make a proper soppy list.
In the meantime I will start it with these truths:
I am grateful for my blog, without which I might not have learnt my voice, or the power of expressing myself.
I am grateful for my comment box, without which I would not have access to some of the most astute, witty, and intelligent people in my life, many of whom belie their shyness to share their experience.
I am grateful for my blog, without which I wouldnt have had a conversation starter with some of my very very best friends (or my beloved).
I am grateful to my blog-peers, who have supported me with links and reading, with emails and twitters and criticism and realistic statements about how not-important blogging is.
I am grateful for my blog, without which I would not have found the job I have, and hopefully the future opportunities I have been offered.
I am grateful to anyone that reads my blog, without whom, many times, I would not have had a reason to keep going. I think they – you – are all lovely.
Ill expand on this tomorrow – there are a lot more non-blog things to be grateful for after all. Please excuse me for being terribly sentimental and American. They say Thankful – but I am grateful, as we would say, in my country. I really am grateful. Thankful, they say- but to be grateful is good enough for me. Its ok to be grateful – in general, not to anything at all, right?
But I wanted to tell you Im grateful for you.
Youve saved – and made – my life in many ways.
Shall we make this a meme? Why might you be grateful for your blog? Ask your readers why they might, , will you? It might be a bit nice?