There are pros and cons to being a vampire, I think

It is an endlessly interesting subject, which I will no doubt expand upon a length, someday.

Things it is difficult to do when you have fangs

  1. Blow up balloons.
  2. Whistle.
  3. Drink out of drinks cans. Like Coke, or Irn Bru. Or beer.
  4. Hum, contentedly.
  5. Take surreptitious bites out of bites out of anything without getting caught.
  6. Impressions of Mick Jagger.
  7. Drink through a straw. Although this maybe easier, depending on overbite/underbite situation.
  8. Wine Gums.
  9. Oral Sex.
  10. Bubblegum.
  11. Bite ones lip, while dancing. (Or any other time) Well, its possible, but will leave a mark.
  12. Other.

On the other hand

This it is EASY to do with fangs

  1. Open boxes. Heavily sellotaped boxes.
  • (says driedfrog) Forever negate the need for a hole punch.


I feel sure I am underselling vampires. I will work on this when I get home.
I will have a think on the train.


I have had a think on the train.
I have nothing.

Vampires have a hard life, I have decided, and probably dont enjoy parties very much.


But are quite useful in offices, I think.