There are a lot of incredible things about India; I didnt have much time in any one place, but even I could see there are a lot of incredible, beautiful and heartbreaking things about being in India – but as Im bound to write them elsewhere (no such thing as a free lunch etc) and I dont believe in giving anyone sloppy seconds, Im afraid youre not going to hear about them yet.

So, you ask, what am I not going to write about in my travel piece and therefore will feel morally free to write about here, meanwhile?

Security checks, bowel movements and someones uncles rug shop.

Woo, eh? Lucky old you.